11th Ches - Just before 1st Watch Jaya & Nas

Here they were, back in Thurmaster. It was almost a 10-day since the last group discussion outside the Thurmaster "wall". Jaya felt uneasy still about how some of that went... but one thing in particular stuck fear into her heart.

Nas knew. Or at least he thought he did. She had been trying to get a chance to speak with him and find out exactly what he thought he knew. He had lived among the Halflings for a time. She now knew him for the elf who was seeking revenge for his family's death. He had come from her homeland... left there not long after she had... at best he might know if there was any pursuit... at worst, he was the pursuit.

Her heart thudded in her small chest as she made her way up to the roof of the ramshackled remains of a building they were using for shelter. At least this one wasn't moldy.

She had left Friend Carlos below, stating she needed to do something alone and would meet up with him for watch as usual. She knew he wouldn't repeat anything she said, unless someone commanded him to... but she didn't want to take that chance.

She approached with her customary silence, but even then knew the elf would hear her coming. "Nas? I would speak with you, if that is alright?" she said tentatively, barely more than a whisper.

Nas had not heard her until she was most of the way up onto the roof. He was stuck in his own thoughts. The undead they faced a was both a cleansing and an unerving experience. He had seen undead many times skeletons and zombies even vampires, but the wraith was unnerving him most. "Is that the fate of my Grandparents?" He thought to himself. He was thankful to put that wraith's spirit to rest finally but wondered if he possesd the strength to do so when he knew the spirit.


"Nas? I would speak with you, if that is alright?" Jaya said softly.

"Of course it is all right. but please come quietly in the manner I know you capable of as my entertainment has arrived and I don't wish to spook it."

Jaya approached even quieter than ranger thought she was capable of. As she approached and sat next to him he pointed to the edge of the roof top.

"I am unsure of how well halflings see in the dark but if you look carefully you will see a small mouse on the edgef the roof. What you will be unable to see is that their is a black snake that was sunning itself earlier in the day now in its hidden home just off the edge of the roof in that clogged rain gutter. Now on a normal night that might be intresting enough but tonight in that tree over there is hidden an owl with two small owlings. so now the question is how will this turn out. if the mouse ventures to much closer than the snake can strike it. like wise if it moves the other way the owl will have a clear flight in to grab it. but the snake must also be careful as the owl is large enough to take it as well and so must not venture too far out or be in danger.

After informing Jaya of what she was about to see. The mouse moved closer to the snake drawing it out of its hole to strike. it did so with lightning speed the mouse died quickly but not soon enough as the owl had seen the movement and struck the snake before it could finish swallowing its meal. asthe owl flew off with the snake in its claws the mouse fell to the ground where a young stray cat quickly came and snagged the free meal.

Nas laughed and was a little giddy much like a mage that had discovered a pile of unknown scrolls and books "An unexpected outcome with a free meal for the young cat! Truley a spectacular show. Nature can teach use many things if we only listen."

"Now then what did you wish to speak of? It must be something of a great nature to bring you up here to see me." I have not know many halfling who enjoy being so far off the ground."

I have not know many halfling who enjoy being so far off the ground.

"I am sure you have known many Halflings from your time in my homeland. But, I think you already know that I am not like most Halflings." Jaya said in her almost whisper.

"Which is precisely what I wish to discuss. You will recall the evening discussion amongst our group when last we stayed here in Thurmaster, just after the goblin fiasco." she waited a moment and at an almost imperceptible nod from the elf continued, "I wonder if you also remember what you said that night? About me knowing about you and you knowing about me? I was wondering what exactly you meant by that."

WoTmaster wrote:

"Which is precisely what I wish to discuss. You will recall the evening discussion amongst our group when last we stayed here in Thurmaster, just after the goblin fiasco." she waited a moment and at an almost imperceptible nod from the elf continued, "I wonder if you also remember what you said that night? About me knowing about you and you knowing about me? I was wondering what exactly you meant by that."

"I was trained to spot someone with your skills as we are often to sides of the same coin. although your meathods are a little more final than my own. You are an Assasin correct? Although that is not typically a halfling profession. which fooled me a little for awhile."

Was I also correct that you in turn are aware that I am a Stalker? I too am unusual as elves are not usually in this profession."

"I was an assassin. Or rather, I was trained to be one." Jaya hung her head as she once again battled with the memory of those haunting eyes. "I didn't figure I could hide it from you once I learned who you were. I am sure you heard of my family while you lived among the Halfling people. They have quite the reputation, though you may not know them by name, they try to keep a low profile and keep the family name out of business transactions. On the surface the Anjuli family is one of prosperous merchants, underneath that lies a world of thievery and deception. I am the youngest of 8 and as they were well "stocked" with thieves I was sent for a different education."

"I have only ever engaged my profession once. I found the thrill of using my skills exhilarating... but, I found the outcome of a job well done to be distasteful. I am haunted by what I have done, and seek only to make up for it. I have spoken with Lady Darya, without giving away the nature of my past, to ask her advice on seeking redemption. I do not seek to take life. In fact what I did last night, to those bandits who attacked us, sickens me. I now only use my skills to defend my life and those of you all whom I travel with."

"When I heard you had come from the Halfling homeland my suspicions of you were confirmed. I had heard of you while you lived among my people. I didn't know the term "slayer" but I knew well enough the description of what you were, what you do. I have but one last question for you. Have you come to take me back?" Jaya had the dagger with a small amount of poison on the tip carefully concealed, she would hate to use it against Nas, she actually liked him. But, she would not go back to her family and be their tool for death.

WoTmaster wrote:"I was
"When I heard you had come from the Halfling homeland my suspicions of you were confirmed. I had heard of you while you lived among my people. I didn't know the term "slayer" but I knew well enough the description of what you were, what you do. I have but one last question for you. Have you come to take me back?"

I see now your concern and if I may say, your confusion as well.I am a man of not one but two professions. Each has its own identity but they complement each other well. I am an Undead Slayer I only kill the foul abominations that are the unliving. Skeletons zombies and such. I specialize in wraiths and vampires for obvious reasons.

I am also a Stalker. I am similar to an assasin in skills but I use them very differently. I do not seek to kill my quarry rather I track and observe. Gathering information and finding those who do not wish to be found. I rarely engage my targets at all. For example the other day i could have tracked the bandits discovering their camp watching them getting a count of their total numbers and even noted gaurds around the camp their change times and even where the gaurds who doze off on duty can be found.
I take that information and give it to whomever hired me to get it or in this cae our group. What i done with that information is not of a concern to me so much. I remove emotion when I work so that I may observe and make my own concluions as to what my next step will be.

I went to the halflings to learn to move silently as you do. As my prior instructor told me always learn from the best. I do not know many names of the halflings I worked with as it was only done so as a favor to my instructor to settle some debt. It could have been a member of your family but I do not know for fact who it was. Either way I am here of my own free will I was sent by no one and have no intrest in taking you anywhere you do not wish to go. So your answer is no I am not here for you.

Now if I may be so bold can you give me the details of your job that you seek atonement for? It is not my job to judge you for your actions however I have found that things are not always so black and white as we would like. For example it is wrong to kill any creature yet for food we do so freely as it is part of natures plan. Yet even when we kill things we cannot eat or will not eat are ther not times when it is seen as a good and heroic act. If by killing 1 person it prevents the loss of 100's of lives is it not better to kill the one? I will help you atone for your past if it indeed needs to be atoned for. If you give me the details I will look at the matter impartially and advise you from there. It maybe easier for you to discuss it with me than trying to explain it to the Paladin or the Priests.


I may also be able to find out more information on your only job. Although I will not be able to do so quickly or possibly even from here at all. I have some ability to discover information when I need too. But that is up to you I will not inquire without your approval.

Either way I am here of my own free will I was sent by no one and have no intrest in taking you anywhere you do not wish to go. So your answer is no I am not here for you.

At these words from Nas, Jaya let out a small breath that she wasn't even aware she had been holding and her hand slid silently away from her death blade.

Now if I may be so bold can you give me the details of your job that you seek atonement for? It is not my job to judge you for your actions however I have found that things are not always so black and white as we would like. For example it is wrong to kill any creature yet for food we do so freely as it is part of natures plan. Yet even when we kill things we cannot eat or will not eat are ther not times when it is seen as a good and heroic act. If by killing 1 person it prevents the loss of 100's of lives is it not better to kill the one? I will help you atone for your past if it indeed needs to be atoned for. If you give me the details I will look at the matter impartially and advise you from there. It maybe easier for you to discuss it with me than trying to explain it to the Paladin or the Priests.


I may also be able to find out more information on your only job. Although I will not be able to do so quickly or possibly even from here at all. I have some ability to discover information when I need too. But that is up to you I will not inquire without your approval.

"I will try to tell you about it. I think you may be right that it will be easier to explain to you than a paladin. I had been away from home since I was a child training with my master to become an assassin, a "hit man" for the family. When my master could teach me no more I returned to my family. I was excited to finally belong with them to have a place and a purpose among them. I had always been the baby of the family and never taken seriously, but now I was the most deadly of them all. I knew things, had skills that they would never have or know. I was impatient to put my skills to use. It seemed like an eternity before my services were needed. Then the day came when it all would change... I had a target.

"It took a lot of study and research and time to infiltrate the rival organization. A former comrade of my fathers had turned against him. I knew this man. I had not seen him in many years but I remembered him from my childhood, when he would come to spend time with my father. By all outward appearances he and my father were still thick as thieves, if you'll excuse the saying. He didn't know that my father was on to him and his betrayal.

"We faked a falling out with my family and myself. I left home and made myself available to be recruited by this man whom I had thought of as an uncle -- this man who had betrayed us. I spent many months with him and his family, eventually they became accustomed to my presence in the house and would forget I was there. I heard things that weren't meant for anyone outside the organization... especially not for anyone in my family to hear. He was plotting against my family. My assignment was to cut the head off the organization, he was my target. He had to die.

"I planned it carefully. There was a dinner party being thrown, there would be plenty of people around, I had even planned my escape and set up a new servant to take the fall. The night of the party came and I was wound tight with anticipation. Finally all my training would be put to use. I would save my family. My timing was perfect, I had made flawless plans... taken every consideration. Well, all but one. My target turned toward me at the last second and as my death blade pierced his flesh I saw the look of surprise and hurt in his eyes. Not the physical hurt, the emotional hurt... I had become the betrayer.

"I fled. Keeping to the shadows I made my way home to report. My master was right to call me 'Nimble Shadow' for when I arrived home no one heard or saw me enter. That is when I heard them talking, my father and my eldest brother. I had been wrong, I had been duped -- used. My family were the ones doing the betraying. I had killed a man who had loved me like his own child and it was all for nothing. I had eliminated a good man who stood in the way of my father's profits, and I had been all too eager to do it."

Jaya paused, wiping her hands over her face, wiping away the moisture from her eyes. "So you see, I am sickened by what I have done. I left that night and have been on the move ever since. I know not if they follow me, but I assume they do. I am a very valuable asset that they have invested time and money in. And I know the truth, too much to be left alive. So I look over my shoulder and I watch for the blade I know must be coming for me. I am sorry I suspected you. Forgive me?"

I believe after hearing your story that by joining us and taking on Friend Carlos that you have repaid your debt to the gods. In fact I believe you may have never had a debt to pay. The approval and love of family is a powerful driving force and the need of a child to find a recieve that almost unbearablre. As someone who lost my family and had no way to recieve it I understand this drive. Through your story you did not act of your own accord you did so at the behest of your own family. You were not the betrayer your father was to both your uncle and you. In this action you were used as a tool and like the tool you do not take the blame. I do not blame my swords for the blood it spills it is my hand that made it do so. Your father and your family own the blame for this betrayl and death not you.

If you feel you must do more than I suggest putting your efforts into Friend Carlos. Giving him his own life back is more than enough.

Jaya took a moment to consider what Nas had told her. "Thank you for your insight. I am glad I shared this with you. I am afraid tho, that while I was misled, I wasn't just a tool used by my father. I had a choice -- to kill or not to kill -- and I chose to kill. I chose to take another's life. This was not self defense. It was carefully planned. And although my family shares some of the blame, it cannot alleviate the responsibility I feel."

"Lady Darya has told me about the need to kill for survival and protection as in the ambush our first time to Milbourn, and the attack last night would be the same. It doesn't mean I regret it any less. I should seek to incapacitate instead of mortally wound whenever possible, but sometimes my training takes over. It is difficult to aim for less lethal parts of the body when you have been trained for so long to go for the quick kill. But I endeavor to try."

"Once again, thank you for speaking with me. I would appreciate it if this could stay just between us. I don't think the others would react well to my former profession."

WoTmaster wrote: "Thank you for your insight. I am glad I shared this with you. I am afraid tho, that while I was misled, I wasn't just a tool used by my father. I had a choice -- to kill or not to kill -- and I chose to kill. I chose to take another's life. This was not self defense. It was carefully planned. And although my family shares some of the blame, it cannot alleviate the responsibility I feel."

I understand this pain but I ask you another question to consider. As I do not know the answer myself I am curious as to your answer as well. What becomes of an assasin who does not complete her mission? You say you had a choice but did you? You feared I was here to get you even after completion of your mission would you be in less risk if you had not performed the task? The reason I ask is that this killing may have been in self defense without you realizing it. Besides with what you have eluded to of your father and his dealing I am sure with a bit of research I could discover a wealth of reasons why this man deserved his fate, and some why he did not. If he had split from your Father could there have been a powerstruggle or all war? By your dead did you save others lives? You would know better than I.

WoTmaster wrote:"Lady Darya has told me about the need to kill for survival and protection as in the ambush our first time to Milbourn, and the attack last night would be the same. It doesn't mean I regret it any less. I should seek to incapacitate instead of mortally wound whenever possible, but sometimes my training takes over. It is difficult to aim for less lethal parts of the body when you have been trained for so long to go for the quick kill. But I endeavor to try."

While I respect Lady Darya and her convictions I find her views to be a bit to constricted for my taste. I find her views to be fine for one who has seen little of the outside world and who has lived a privlaged life. She sees life as a piece of parchment a good side and a bad side very little else. I see it more like a loaf of bread there is a good and bad side but in between there is much and it is similar to neither side. Killing is not always bad or always good each battle gives us many choices not 1 or 2. For example you say it is ok to kill for survival but what is survival? Who decides? If I kill a deer for food because I am hungry is that more noble than the bandit who attacks us for our money to feed his self? What then of the vampires who killed my family for need to feed? Each case is different and yet similar. Killing and fighting are never simple it is your own internal compass that determines what is right and wrong and why. You say the remorse is the same for each life you have taken but i hope and believe it is not. For if you share the same guilt when you kill justly or injustly as you detirmined then you cannot tell the differnece between the two and may become that which you fear most without your knowledge. I always ask the gods to grant those who lives I have taken to grant them and their famlies peace. I have only rarely asked for forgiveness because I detirmened my actions unjust? I also warn you about incapactation for it is sometimes worse than a death sentance. Wounds do not always heal correctly. In the larger towns there are many former soldiers who recieved wounds in batttle and are now crippled or deformed. They are not able to return to the peaceful work they knew and are forced to beccome theives,outlaws or beggars merely to survive. It is a tortured existance. I survived my run in with the vampires who killed my family yet until I came here there were many times I wished I had been among the dead rather than wandering alone. Those that the vampires showed mercy too are far worse than even my own plight. In the wilds kills are quick and thus merciful. Injuring and toying with prey is not common among natures beasts thus I see a quick kill under justified circumstance far better than incapactation usually. Now if you can learn to incapacitate without injury like Jace does with his sleep spells that is humane. it is often better to render unconcious than to kill if possible and with your skills we may call on you to do so often. I have heard of a weapon usually used by thieves but perhaps you can learn to use it or already know it. Have you ever heard of a sap? Perhaps this will serve you well as it allows you to use you highly developed skills and not kill. I also maybe able to use my herbalsim skills to develop poisons which put victims to sleep rather than kill. on your thrown weapons this could be exactly what you are looking for.

WoTmaster wrote:"Once again, thank you for speaking with me. I would appreciate it if this could stay just between us. I don't think the others would react well to my former profession."

It was my pleasure and feel free to come anytime. Even if just for the nights etertainment. I will not speak to anyone of this. On that you have my word. I do not need to tell you the risk we pose to the group if we are ever caught. Stalkers and Assasins are never looked kindly upon by those who are up to no good. However we offer our friends quite an array of possibilities when trying to solve problems. I ask for two favors however one is that you do not continue look down upon your profession as you do now. You have been trained as an assasin and you are one for good or bad. The skills you posses will be very valuable to this group. If you do not wish to use them to kill I admire and respect you for that and will come up with ways to help you be who you are in both aspects. The second favor is that you too do not speak of what I am too the group they are aware I am an undead slayer and that is all I wish them to know as news of a stalker in these parts may make those that have taken Genilith quick to react to the threat. It may also generate the group attention that neither you or I are comfortable with.

"I find now that I am more confused than ever on what a necessary death constitutes. Perhaps it all comes down to perspective. Any of us might or might not see it as necessary to kill a bandit that attacks us just as the bandit might see it necessary (or not) to kill us when attacking us."

Killing and fighting are never simple it is your own internal compass that determines what is right and wrong and why. You say the remorse is the same for each life you have taken but i hope and believe it is not. For if you share the same guilt when you kill justly or unjustly as you determined then you cannot tell the difference between the two and may become that which you fear most without your knowledge.

Jaya thought a moment. "No, the remorse that I feel is not the same, however the regret that I have taken another life - whether necessary or not - is there regardless of the cause for the death. Is it wrong for me to regret the violence I commit? Even if it is in defense of my life, can I not regret that there was no other way? I am more afraid that I should become uncaring, and judging that one person's life is less important than another's, feel no remorse for killing them!" This thought terrified her, and for a moment she was glad of the haunting vision of her uncle's eyes.

"This is not the same as not distinguishing between monsters and evil creatures. I feel no remorse for killing the goblins, though I feel that the situation lacked honor. Before you comment, yes Assassins have honor. There is a code and when we take a job it is on our honor that we will complete it, and that we will not betray our employer if caught. If I took a job and did not complete it, my life could very well be forfeit. But I would argue that the fact that I took the job in the first place and if I should judge someone else should die instead of me, would argue against my life being worth more or even worth saving at all. Say I take a job under false information and find the target is innocent of all wrong doing. I am still honor bound to complete the job, but I personally find being an oath breaker and dishonored favorable to taking an innocent life. If I choose to kill the innocent to save my life and my honor, I should not think my life worth saving as that very act would condemn me morally speaking."

She thought again of her uncle... Besides with what you have eluded to of your father and his dealing I am sure with a bit of research I could discover a wealth of reasons why this man deserved his fate, and some why he did not. If he had split from your Father could there have been a power-struggle or all out war? By your deed did you save others lives?

"My uncle was no saint, but he wasn't plotting against my father, he was trying to protect himself from my family, trying to change his life and redeem himself. And I killed him. A man who loved me like his own and trusted me with his life and I betrayed that trust, plotted against him from the beginning. No, I didn't save others lives by doing so. And I know it was my job and could have been my life or his but I still CHOSE to kill him. I was trained to do so, trained to be a killer and I am very good at it, but being good at it and trained to it does not mean I have to LIKE it."

"I do not know if I agree with you that killing someone is preferable to merely wounding them. I understand your argument, and see your point, but cannot agree. As for your herbalism skills, I have some skill in herbalism of my own, and indeed have a substance in my possession that would work for incapacitation. I feel, however that in this group should I employ such means they would be a waste as someone else would just finish off any that I incapacitated and then I would have only accomplished the prolonging of their suffering, the waste of my resources, and the transfer of the burden of their death from me to one or more of our companions. Also what if the substance should not take effect quickly and one of our companions be wounded or killed because of my qualms? I could never forgive myself for that! So while it would ease my conscious not to kill those we must fight, I do not know that it is feasible. I think I should either just learn to deal with the killing or else try to convince our group that I am incapacitating for purposes of questioning and ask that they not kill them... even so they would most likely die after questioning..."

"I thank you for your discretion and you can count on mine. I agree that it would be dangerous for anyone else to know what we are and that kind of attention would not benefit anyone, least of all us. I will try, because you ask it, not to look down on my profession. Though most use it for evil or personal gain, I will seek to use my skills in more honorable and true ways. Now I fear my time has grown short and I must meet up with Friend Carlos for watch. Once again, I thank you for your time and would enjoy and look forward to conversations with you in the future."

She rose to leave, then paused and slowly turned back around to face Nas.

"I am glad you weren't sent here to bring me back to my family, Nas." she whispered. "I like you. I would have regretted having to incapacitate you to escape, and knowing what I know about you being a Stalker... well, I know there would only be one way to stop you from tracking me down. I'm really glad I didn't have to make the choice between your life and the lives of those my family would use me to kill."

Just maybe, she thought as she turned away again, you would have bested me and this would all have been over. Hopefully we will never know which of us is quicker.

As Jaya Turned Nas simply stated. "Listen to your heart it is in the right place but your mind confuses it at times. You do however underestimate your companions and if you should incapacitate a foe I will protect that foe from harm even from the others if need be."

After she had left Nas chuckled silently to himself. "When did you become the stoic philosipher?" he thought.

at this a small voice he knew well as the voice of doubt and pain spoke. It was the voice that told him when to leave and fueled his pain. it said, "Do you actually believe that nonsense you told her?"

Nas responded with a strong "I do, and I will die before I change that fact."

Nas felt himself lighten like a burden had been lifted from him and then fro somewhere deep with him came a third voice one he had not heard in almost 100 years. It was his Father's voice and it said. "I am proud of you, it is time to release your burden and meet your destiny." Whith these words the voice faded as if a ghost. Then for the first time in his long life Nas was able to admit that the death of his family was not his fault and he could not have saved them had he been there.

Nas then laid down of his rooftop bed and for the first time in his memory he slept until he was awaked by the dwarf in full armor heading out for watch. two full hours of uninteruppted sleep was the most he had managed in his life. "Things are changing." He thought as he jumped down from his perch and went to meet Torin for the watch.